7 Ways to Get Through an Identity Crisis

identity crisis

Psychologists say that an identity crisis occurs when you start questioning your sense of self, and when these questions consumes your daily thoughts and affect your relationships.

With the proper guidance, however, an identity crisis can be turned into an opportunity for self-exploration, instead of a gateway for depression. Here are some ways that can help you get through an identity crisis:

1-Stop Anchoring Yourself to Mortal Things:

The primary reason for recurring identity crises is that we tend to identify our personalities with material things, like our relationships, jobs, and possessions. Instead, use your skill and abilities to define you, as they are solely your own and will not be taken from you in time.

For instance, instead of identifying as ‘a marketing executive’ or ‘your son’s mother’, think of yourself as ‘a strong, willful, and intelligent individual’.

2-Look Inside:

Take a moment to self-reflect. Ask yourself what’s changed about your personality, preferences, perceptions of yourself, values, and your goals for the future. Think on how you can achieve or improve on them.

And don’t worry if these answers change after a few years, or decades. You age, so why not your personality and ambitions?

3-Determine What Grounds You:

Do you feel as if you’re floating meaninglessly by, without any goal in sight? If so, then figure out which relationships means enough to ground you back into your daily life. It could be your family, friends, colleagues and/or romantic partner.

Now think about why you chose them, what they mean to you, and how their absence would have affected you. If it isn’t personal relationships that ground you, then what else? Are you satisfied with the answer, or do want to change that?

4-Reassess Your Life:

If a recent loss or a major change has brought about your identity crisis, then think of it as a necessary step towards personal growth, instead of perceiving it as an unconquerable obstacle.

Use these sudden changes as an opportunity to re-assess and re-evaluate your personality, dreams, and your direction in life.

5-Visualize Your Future Self:

If simply thinking proves difficult, practice visualizing your best possible future self. Take a few minutes, and imagine specific details about yourself (career, personal life, etc.) in the near future. Now write it all down, and think about how the can be achieved.

This will also serve as a reminder, and a ‘life-plan’ to center yourself; that you can refer to whenever you feel lost, insecure, and unsure of yourself.

6-Be Open to Change:

Change is good. It is often frightening in its uncertainty, but it is good. Instead of living a stagnant life, think about yourself in 10 or 20 years, and whether you would regret not accepting these changes and the opportunities that came with them.

Your core-self will remain; no one can take that away. Simply think of it as a new experience that might bring you closer to the goals you seek.


After accepting and embracing the concept of change, start exploring. If it’s a job loss, look around for newer opportunities that you might otherwise have ignored. If a relationship has ended, then open yourself to newer ones.

Develop new habits that you think might be useful in furthering your goals. You will be surprised by how strong, resourceful, and flexible you truly are.

An identity crisis shouldn’t be seen as a barrier, but as a stepping stone towards better opportunities; and a better, more satisfying life. However, if, at any point, you feel lost and unable to cope, don’t be afraid to reach out for help.

You can also book an appointment with a top Psychologist in Islamabad, Karachi and Lahore through oladocx.com,  for assistance to find the RIGHT Doctor for aiding you in your self-discovery. 

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About the Author: Dr. Arooba

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